I just had this experience that had me pondering things for a minute.
I coded something inaccurately and this item didn’t show up in the system indicating the item was completed even though it was entered.
Someone else asked me about it and invited me to correct it, so it would show up accurately.
I figured out the solution and made the adjustment and everything is right in the world.
I paused for a minute and recognized, I spent more time figuring out how to correct the problem than if I would just slow down a bit and be aware of what I was doing in the first place.
The thought that came through my mind had me wondering about how many times others do this too.
Do you create problems just to solve them?
If you do, I’m curious about what this looks like for you in your life?
When you’re desperately looking for how to change what your dog is doing, you have to take a look at what you’re doing first.
Changes you need to make could be stepping into your dog’s paws a bit and seeing the world through their eyes, understanding and connecting with how they feel from one moment to the next before expecting your dog to anything differently may be your first step.
This step actually may be a leap for you.
Moving away from the belief that we have to control our dogs and expecting them to follow every direction in a moment’s notice may be something you have to unlearn alongside empathizing with how your dog feels.
Before you can understand how your dog feels and be compassionate to your dog, do you give yourself the same love?
You may feel a wall of resistance show up as you consider feelings and emotions of you and your dog.
I invite you to lean in to the resistance and see what shows up for you.
Early on in my relationship with my dog, Jack, I struggled with his barking and separation anxiety. I also struggled with feeling confident and knowing my own self worth.
At that point in my life, I was just starting to understand myself and heal from trauma I experienced in my own life.
I gave permission to the wall of resistance to keep me stuck.
I gave permission to the wall of resistance to prevent me from moving forward.
I gave permission to the wall of resistance to not change.
If you’re like me, the resistance told me I desired to unlearn and heal from being taught that my feelings don’t matter and surviving by avoiding how I felt or sharing how I felt with others.
Unlearning old beliefs and changing patterns of thought peel back layers of hurt and pain and heal the shame and guilt that accompanied them.
By changing these patterns and learning new beliefs about yourself, you start to take action in a new way.
You allow yourself to experience each moment with a fresher perspective and can respond with more clarity and confidence with whatever life throws at you and your dog.
You begin feeling the love and connection you have with your dog and prioritizing this relationship in your life.
When you feel depleted, exhausted and utterly overwhelmed with everything going on, how is it even possible to show up at 100%?
It isn’t possible.
Doing all the things for everyone else, leaves you behind.
You start to forgo what you want and dismisses how you feel.
What would it look and feel like if you helped yourself before helping others?
If you prioritized taking care of your body and mind, how would this support the others who you care for on a daily basis?
How would your friends, family, clients and even your companion animals benefit?
When you prioritize your health and wellbeing, you’re telling yourself you matter.
How you value yourself matters.
You have amazing dreams and goals and drives to serve others.
Everyday you are love in action.
But for others.
How can showing yourself the same energy, love and compassion you pour into your work and family life be given to yourself too?
It can be as simple as recognizing your breath.
It can be as real as acknowledging the tension your body feels when X thing is said or happens and then recognizing what you can do to transmute that energy into awareness of what isn’t aligned for you.
That right there was a gift I received yesterday.
My husband informed me about something potentially happening with his work in the Army which I’ve experienced before on numerous occasions, but didn’t recognize what was showing up for me.
I usually would become shut down or even angry.
But, in this moment, I was able to feel the tension in my stomach, the tightness in my chest because I was holding my breath and feeling myself starting to freeze.
Instead of reacting out fear, I was able to share with him how my body felt and I was able to honestly share with him that these sensations have shown up more times than I can count for the past 14 years due to his military career.
The description allowed for him, being able to understand how I truly felt.
We both received connection and I honored myself by pausing and recognizing what my body was telling me.
Four Paws & You Dog Training 