Begin Again

Phew! It’s been over a year since I wrote about mindfulness and awareness through our companionship with our pets. I have shared recently about an upcoming Phenix Advocacy Center, but I’ve not put my finger on the keyboard to express my thoughts in awhile!

I’ve been in a deep spiritual journey, unraveling my own limiting beliefs and personal trauma experiences that have lived within the cells of my being for as long as I can remember. What I’ve learned about myself is that my body remembers longer than what I can consciously recall for myself. Healing is harsh. Hard truths come out as they were tucked away for so long, but they manifested in the way I took action and how I saw myself. Uncovering the root of these beliefs were painful, but necessary for my own growth. Shedding the past of what held me back and prevented me from living in alignment with what is true for me.

What is emerging (you all may already have an idea because of reading my posts over the course of time) is that as I evolve and change, so does my focus in how I show up and serve. Through my experience in work, play and just being, I’m able to observe the rhythm of my body and how I make choices that are more clearly aligned with me is transformative not only for myself, but also for my dogs.

One of the most insightful things I’ve learned about myself is that my breath and stillness has shown me what the tension in my body is communicating to me and also what I need to do to help it along. No longer is the answer a grand gesture, but rather feeling the subtle shifts and electrical impulses that spark inspiration within me. I feel the reorganization of my energy from within. The rise and fall of my breath is the direction I follow and truly, everything I needs is already inside of me as it is for you!

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Hank changed our lives. His healing, put my own inner work on blast and I’m grateful to what he’s showed me about myself through his presence in my life. I’m shedding the labels that confined me. It’s no longer about analyzing what dogs do and don’t do, but instead flowing with what shows up and responding through conscious awareness. Additionally, if something happens you don’t like or prefer, that’s were you get to grow and learn about yourself even if that is not what you expected. Life is here to make you happy, it’s here to help you grow.

Phenix Advocacy Center’s Next Talk!

Losses That Don’t Get Flowers: Disenfranchised Grief in Animal Care

a Let’s Get Real conversation sponsored by the Phenix Advocacy Center (PAC)

Hosted by Colleen Pelar with special guest, Melissa Trevathan-Minnis, PhD

Monday, October 27, 2025, at 12:00 pm Eastern via Zoom

Cost: $10 (donation to the non-profit PAC)

Join us for a conversation about the grief that doesn’t get acknowledged—the kind that comes with saying goodbye to animals you’ve known for years, euthanizing animals you’ve cared for, or carrying the emotional weight of decisions that happen behind the scenes.

This is disenfranchised grief: loss that’s real and painful, but that the world around you doesn’t recognize or validate. For those of us in animal care, these unwitnessed losses can accumulate quietly, leaving us feeling isolated or wondering why we can’t stop thinking about a situation that occurred months ago. 

In this discussion, we’ll explore why these losses matter, how they affect us differently than grief that gets seen and supported, and most important, how to honor them in ways that actually help. Whether you’re carrying fresh grief or old grief that never quite got processed, this is a space where your feelings make sense and your losses count.

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You must join this chat live – recordings will not be shared as our topics are often sensitive. 

Once you have made your $25 donation, we will email you the Zoom link for this event. 

Thank you for supporting the PAC! We are advocates for R+ canine professionals. 

Disclaimer:  This PAC-sponsored event is for educational purposes only. If you are in need of professional help from a qualified mental health professional, please visit the resource section of our PAC website: www.phenixadvocacycenter.org/resources

Choosing Wisely

“The moment in front of you is not bothering you. You are bothering yourself about the moment that is in front of you.” Michael Singer

When something happens like your dog barking or pulling on the leash, you feel angry and frustrated.

Your perception about that moment of the barking or pulling is what colors the experience.

You are making yourself angry and frustrated. You are labeling the experience as bad or things aren’t perfect or you don’t have time for this.

Then you yell at your dog for vocalizing or you yank on the leash because you tell yourself you can’t handle what’s happening with your dog.

What is showing up in these situations is your own fear.

Fear of not being good enough about keeping your dog safe.

Fear of not being perfect in having a “bomb proof” dog.

Fear of what others are going to say about you and how others perceive you.

Your mind is very powerful, but your mind isn’t so powerful you lose your ability to choose.

You can choose to handle the situation and look at what’s happening inside of you when the world presents a moment you’re saying is bad or terrible or you want to run and hide.

Take the moment and take a conscious breath.

Breathe in and feel the breath travel through you.

Exhale and take a moment and feel the breath leave your body.

Repeat.

See if you can observe the thoughts that come up and learn to let them go.

The only way for your body to let go of past hurts or pain is to allow the sensations to pass through you.

Allow yourself to feel.

Observe the sensations.

Remain present.

This moment is the only moment that matters and it will go by in an instant.

Choose wisely.