What are Your Expectations?

I read this quote the other day by Rona Minarik, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

I don’t know about you, but this blew my mind.

As a trainer and coach, I often hear from clients about their deep feelings of frustration in how their dogs are “not listening” or “not obeying the rules”.

When we expect a dog who remains at an emotional age of a 2 year old toddler to follow the rules immediately and explicitly every single time and they don’t, you are already setting yourself and your dog up for failure.

Your expectations are the building blocks for the type of relationship you’re building with your dog and when the foundation is rocky, how can you expect your dog to trust or feel safe with you and therefore make the choice to be with you?

You are creating the life with your dog to be frustrating and this is making you angry.

When you ask yourself, what motivates you to create these expectations, what shows up?

Do you find yourself comparing yourself to others?

What do you feel when you think about how others may be perceiving your dog’s behavior?

You have the power within yourself to change how you feel about your dog which will directly impact how you perceive your dog’s behavior.

When you recognize you’re feeling angry and frustrated because you’re telling yourself your dog is “bad” or “disobedient” interrupt this thought pattern.

When you become conscious of these limiting beliefs in the present moment, you can begin recognizing what’s laying beneath the surface and this is where your own transformation can begin.

You begin recognizing you are not your feelings.

Your emotions don’t control you, but you have the power to change how you feel about what’s going on with your dog.

How do you take a step back from the situation and reevaluate what’s going on?

Published by houndbiz

Katherine Porter is a force free, reward based dog behavior advisor and consultant serving clients and their companion dogs worldwide. Her calm and gentle approach in coaching clients in effectively communicating what they want to their dog blends her MSW background into her dog training and behavior practice. Katherine was a behavior consultant for Heeling Hounds after graduation. She opened Four Paws and You Dog Training LLC when the military relocated her family to Fort Sill, OK in 2015. During this time, she volunteered with Rainbow Bridge Can Wait where she provided post adoption consultations to new pet parents. She also developed and implemented tailored behavior modification plans for highly reactive dogs residing at the shelter. She also provided educational programs to military children through interactive workshops at the Fort Sill School Age Center. In 2017, Katherine relocated Four Paws and You Dog Training LLC to Germany. She served the Armed Forces communities in Bavaria. She continued coaching and advising her clients in addressing their companion dog’s fearful and reactive behavioral issues. Katherine takes a Do No Harm approach first and foremost in providing behavioral plans. She is committed in serving clients with gentle and modern science approaches in modifying behavioral concerns such as reactivity, aggression, separation anxiety and fear based responses. Katherine is a member of the Pet Professional Guild. She is focused on integrating a holistic and modern approach in addressing her client’s pet companion reactive behavior issues.

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